You know that feeling of having a crush on someone? When just thinking about them is arousing and makes your whole body feel a little hazy.
Have you ever noticed how sometimes those feelings get a bit more conflicted as you get older?
I still get those feelings for people, but where in the past I might have spent hours day dreaming about them and trying to come up with a way to see them (why do you suppose so many of my crushes did and do live so far away?) I now have a little nagging voice in the back of my head saying "yeah he's great, but..." It's just growing up, it's having a few long term relationships and seeing how and why things don't end up working out. You start to see it and think "yes I'm very attracted to him and want to do unspeakably naughty things to him, but I know we aren't right for each other."
Don't get me wrong I'm not a cynic, if anything I'm a hopeless romantic. Which I actually think might be worse because I want big, enduring, passionate love. I want someone to share my entire life with and I want to still like them 30 years from now. I say "like" because it is my experience that you can love someone and not like them at all. I want someone who I will love, but I also want them to be my best friend. And yeah I know, that may be asking a lot, but like I said I'm a hopeless romantic and that's what I want and I believe I will find it eventually.
Trip no further, pretty sweeting;
Journeys end in lovers meeting,
Every wise man's son doth know.
What is love? 'tis not hereafter;
Present mirth hath present laughter;
What's to come is still unsure:
In delay there lies no plenty;
Then come kiss me, sweet and twenty,
Youth's a stuff will not endure.